My Kotex story

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If by any slim chance you don’t know what Kotex is, its one of the bigger brands for sanitary pads and today thats exactly what I had to get from Guardian in KLIA 2.

kotex

Here is how it started out:

Today I sent my boyfriend to work in KLIA 2 which made me emo as it is because hey 3 days is kinda long come on and aside from that…I welcomed my period friend the yesterday and we all know how uncomfortable that time of the month can be. I was also out of sanitary pads at home and decided to just stock up as I walked by guardian towards the carpark. Bought a pack of sanitary pads and decided that a plastic bag was unnecessary and i was a bit kedekut (stingy) when paying for plastic bags so I didnt get one. (Ya the 20 cent charge is working btw)

Walked out of guardian and got told off about buying a pack of sanitary pads without getting a plastic bag to I would assume hide them…. (????)

Guy walks up to me

“Tak malu ke beli pad tunjuk macam tu? Ish.” (Arent you ashamed of buying that without getting a plastic bag?)

“Huh??? Malu apa?” (Ha? Ashamed of what?)

He looked so hostile at me…for buying god damn sanitary pads.

“Eleh malu la sikit cover la sikit.” (He was telling me I should have gotten plastic bags to keep my pads)

He sounded so rude and belittling that I actually snapped.

“Saya rasa kalau saya lempang awak lagi awak malu, so get the f off and get out of my way.” (I told him that it would be so much more embarrassing for him if i were to hit him and told him to get out of my way)

p/s: I cannot stand it when someone uses ‘eleh’ to speak to me, I find it very very belittling.

Anyway, I just wanted to share this with you because I never actually experienced anything quite like it and truly thought everyone knew women generally get their period every month and its nothing they should be embarrassed about L O L

Telling women getting their sanitary pads that they should hide it away (especially in such a hostile manner) is absolutely unnecessary and…. pardon my french, dumb as f.

This was my brother’s reply after I told him what happened!!

” I would have just chocked slam him and tell him God aint gonna help you know bro ” LOL (referring to the fact he was also a middle aged man wearing a kopiah (religious head gear???)

Women: Don’t ever feel the need to be embarrassed about bleeding. It’s natural and its a cycle that keeps you healthy. Anyone who tells you otherwise needs to be told off.

 

P/s: two weeks ago my well parked car got hit and run by another car who i would assume failed driving school but is driving anyway…. in KLIA 2!!!!! This place has such bad feng shui for me zzzzz

Love me still?

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I’ve always marvelled at the sight of couples who look like they’ve spent their whole lives together..still happy, still in awe at the view they wake up to every morning, still… very much in love.

I never understood how but then maybe today I did, maybe its just something as simple as appreciation. To not let a day go by for them to wonder if they’re still ‘it’ in your eyes. Maybe we misunderstand this idea of appreciation by thinking it involves lavish gifts or date night at an expensive restaurant which really isn’t…those aren’t the best kind.

We deteriorate, physically and those you love..leave them long enough and you’ll let their mind wander to places you don’t want minds to wander. They’ll wonder if you’re still as attracted to them as you were when you had to earn them and thats just it… attraction is priceless, attraction you cannot fake.

Respecting, communicating, understanding, that…you can get by with but with a life so short do we really want to spend the rest of our life waking up to someone we respect, are able to communicate with and understands us?

I always wanted that crazy about each other forever and can’t get your hands off of each other, love. I’ve always craved a love so deep the ocean would be jealous.

I remember being a teenager and I never believed that one could remain attracted and by attracted I mean pause 5 seconds when you see them walk out of the room and thank the world for the way it works and that you’ve found yourself together… remain attracted in the way where you still go damn son….

I also remember being a teenager and I marvelled at the sight of this boy… tall and slender, slightly crooked nose, lashes so thick you’d want to replicate it for a fake eyelash and a head of hair to match.

8? 9? years later, a few apart, many together… after thousands of days I still need a breather whenever I see him. Given of course on days I intend to pick a fight, the marvelling has to be low-key.

Intelligent, courteous, well spoken, kind… He was never ordinary, never just him… he was always outstanding as a person, he looked the part too especially in his uniform. I still get giddy when he fixes his hair in front of the mirror though I rush him and call him vain. I still look at clothes and think it would look so so so so so fine on this fine fine fine looking of a person. I still embarrassingly catch myself being crazily attracted oh hot damn to this person and that I think you cannot fake. I still take random pictures of and silently play this creepy hehehehehe so handsome voice in my head.

Is that key? Remain crazy attracted and letting the other know aside of course everything else you already read on Elite Daily or Thought Catalog- communication is key etc etc etc…….

 

 

Some pictures….

I always thought, take as many pictures as we can… even if the view isn’t picturesque and that was what I used to do, everywhere I went, selfies, views, something…. I always snapped something only to realise they also serve as the most vivid form of a time machine. Some pictures….

Some pictures; they do that to you. One glimpse and you are travelling back in time, you remember exactly how you felt and the thoughts you had. You relive it all, smiling the exact same way for the exact same thing, the good, or curling up as you hear shatters, the same one your heart made, the bad. Some pictures….

I scrolled through my old photos today, some going way back..6/7/8 years back. I saw pictures of my travels, I saw a test snap of my street where I lived from a go pro I just got from London…and they weren’t even clear.

But some pictures…

This picture.

Screen Shot 2017-06-18 at 10.18.03 PM

I caught myself staring into space only to realise in my head..it was 2015 again and I was walking down the street to catch an early bus for work. It was chilly and I had cheap ballerina flats on, what was it £4..? I had my ever then so faithful leather jacket I got from a weekend market.. and I was humming to Kodaline’s Moving On.

‘…when we won’t care about all of our mistakes, our failures, and our glories’, was the exact part of the song that got me and I froze. That chilly morning was getting to my bones and I was blinking so much I might have lost a couple of eyelashes. Mistakes, failures, glories… they rang a bell of what was then a life I left behind. Missed my bus so I walked to the Caledonian Road station.. I thought I needed the walk, one where I kept my head down the entire time.

“I miss him… but I’ll never forgive him. He never wanted forgiveness anyway, he only wanted to be right.”

But I did, I missed him so much my legs felt like they were going to fail on me and the weather for the rest of the day was one that very much agreed with me.

I snapped out of it.. and some pictures….that picture… got me blinking my eyes again the same way I did that chilly morning.

Literal Circle of Trust

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Do men actually think we girls sit together in a coffee shop for hours and discuss our lives? CAUSE THEY’RE RIGHT! Well they’re right for the first time ever as far as I can remember because we don’t on a normal day but some days be the exception to our general rule – HAPPY STUFF ONLY UNLESS SAD STUFF NECESSARY.

We were helping Pipi with her teaching stuff one afternoon cutting stereo foam bunnies holding a book (WHAT) in a cafe that we chose which specifically had huge tables and many chairs so we can work in peace LOL and other kindergarten stuff-

p/s: Pipi is a kindergarten class teacher and she loves her job which naturally makes her go all the way for it even when she isn’t required to. EVERYBODY SHOULD BE LIKE PIPI.

So Emi and I were helping her out and we had occasional stops to check our phone and busily message each other’s boyfriend (mine is imaginary, i check e-mails and twitter but pretend they’re my boyfriend(s) HAH)

A half hour into it Pipi thankfully said thank you for being so supportive in her career and I so casually replied don’t know what but something within eh *giggle* or something around the lines of its fun anyway trying to cut short this emo bit. IM SUCH A BAD FRIEND ): ): but Pipi was totally fine with it..well i think she was HAHAHA. Emi and I continued cutting stuff from circles and triangles that were going to be made into a big sun stuck on the wall with velcro. Apparently the circles and triangles will second as a way for Pipi to teach them shapes too…. If this is not hard work I don’t know what is. I’m sweating from the mere thought of it -.-

Pipi was suppose to go to law school with me btw but she totally ditched pfft i guess now i know why!!!!! hahaha her heart is always for something a lot more….cute/noble hehe.

A few hours later Tiera arrived and brought a tub of Milo Ice-Cream into a cafe…..that I’m pretty sure would prefer no outside food but life is too short for rules I suppose….#thuglife

We talked and worked and cut more stuff and eventually talked more than we worked which was ok because we were done hehehe. AND THEN LIFE HAPPENED. Tiera brought up : Sometimes it feels a bit empty right? Life. Like you want some things to be different. Not everything only some.

I ALMOST FELL OFF MY HUGE CHAIR THAT IF I I DID I WOULD NOT HAVE AN EXCUSE BECAUSE A BIG FOOT COULD NOT FALL OFF FROM SUCH A STABLE HUGE CHAIR….COUCH….

And then I wanted to cut her off also like I did Pipi…. but decided not to and agreed with her, slowly nodding my head.

Dead I thought…So picked up my phone and starting staring at the icons hahahahahaha thinking to myself how true her statement was, I did in fact wished some things were different, wondered what if i did some things differently and these are things that have lived in me for many many many many many years, things that I’ve never pondered upon, by choice.

Slowly it became a little circle that we had and we started talking about regrets if we had, what we wish would be different in our lives, our struggles be it unnoticed or not (in more depth as we are all aware briefly of the problems we face but never talked much about it), and we got to do things again how would we have done it. AND I FELL FOR THIS LITTLE TRUST CIRCLE!!!!!! Don’t get me wrong I trust these girls with my life and everything but you know what they say about opening up that chest of things i wish was different..it feels good/liberating when you’re amongst your closet but when you turn your lights off at night….it stays with you for the longest of time.

Caught myself feeling a little bit…..sad. We all get sad sometimes right?

I spoke out loud of my regrets… and achieving things I’ve always wanted only for it to feel so normal and unhappy or at least not as happy as I thought I should/would be. Of the love I lost because I was too young because we were too young.

I have always been afraid of many things, of not achieving the level of success I want for myself and of course in this particular sense financial stability, only to have something to warm my heart.

“You’ve always been made for success, you’ve always known what you wanted and you’ve always gone out to get it.”

Alhamdullilah I’ve always had it within me, I thought, Amin to her thoughts on me.

But all of the things I’ve been very very very terrified about, something stood out, have always stood out, although quietly, very very sharply at times. What if I gained all the financial success God has set for me but don’t find the right person to share my life with? It feels like I never will. Is this a quarter life crisis thing because I’ve felt this way my whole life…HAHAHA OMG HELP MY POURING EMOTIONS SHOOT THEM HELP ME BY SHOOTING THEM DOWN.

LOL

Or what if I find that person thinking it is that person and it turns out he isn’t and we have family and it doesnt work out ten years down the road either one of us walks out the door being oh so done. Not to sound like the biggest pessimist but that happens and that happens a lot…..

WELL IF THAT HAPPENS IM TAKING THE KIDS AND MIGRATING TO AMERICA DESPITE TRUMP AND BUYING MORE HANDBAGS AND SHOES TO FORGET MY MISERY AND DATE A CK MODEL. THATS WHAT I WILL DO *crosses arms* hehehehe

Enough about me and my syok sendiri.

I’ve always known that I’m surrounded by strong willed individuals, people that will make good and only good happen in this world, God knows how much we need it but being in this momentary literal circle of trust it opened my eyes to how strong Pipi has been….as a person, sister, daughter….as a human. How she has kept herself together through the ordeals her family had to face (something which isn’t my story to tell). She has grown into such a selfless and determined young lady the past year while keeping her cheeks HAHA and cheekiness that has always been what made people (MEN I MEAN MEN NOT PEOPLE NOT GENERAL PEOPLE OR WOMEN LIKE US BUT MEN) attracted everyone to her. A gem, truly.

Then there’s Emi who has a story which isn’t mine to tell either….but…..no words. Zero. My entire life of being friends with Emi she never uttered a word about how someone is unless of course its only reasonable that she does or you know she’s angry. We’ve all got limits but naturally she is just one a kind. Always listening, always. Keeping her comments to herself and….on top of it all I realised loves her family more than anything else this life has to offer. Its so hard to tell a lot more because then I’ll be giving away things I should be giving away cause CIRCLE OF TRUST but my eyes are all wet just from the thought of it!!! ): ): ):

Tiera…I don’t even know what is she made of…pure patience and love? I REALLY DONT KNOW HOW IS IT POSSIBLE SHE LOVES SO WHOLLY!!!!!!!! When giving she gives her all never holding back, NEVER. Not even after being so bruised by life and its way of biting you in the ass when you’re not looking. If there’s anyone we should security/background/character/sincerity check for 365 (or make it an extra one day for crash interrogation) days it would be Tiera’s future husband cause truly..any man that Tiera decides to spend her life with is really the luckiest man in this whole wide world. I’ve never met anyone that has the capability to love and give sincerely as much as she does.

We then continued to sip our coffee, me on my ice tea because one can only have waaaaay to much coffee before bed… wiped our tears that glittered because i like to believe my friends and i are low-key magical creatures, slowly packed up…talked about our plans for tomorrow..wished Pipi good luck with her class (PIPI IS ALSO A CLASS TEACHER BTW!!!!!!!!! MUCH COOL) and said goodbye as we were all driving home separately.

What a drive home it was that night…..

I love my magical creature friends.

Japanese Personality Test

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Courtesy of Sarah, someone I’ve been friends with since the day she thought it would be funny to throw my school bag from a moving school bus- which she eventually did not, I can’t remember why. I guess crazy only makes friends with crazy HAHAHA.

She decided to decipher my personality through a Japanese Cube Personality Test over coffee- something I’ve truly never heard of in my life. I don’t buy horoscopes what more dig deeper into these generic tests but ok la i give chance- apparently Obama took it too? BAHAHAHA IF OBAMA TOOK IT HONEY IM TAKING IT!

Question Number 1: So theres a cube. Where is this cube placed? How big is the cube? How high from the ground is it placed? What is this cube made of?

Answer Number 1: “Sarah……my cube is in my handbag, its the size of the normal rubix cube you can find in kedai mamak (sundry shops) , its in my bag so its as far from the ground as I would like my handbag to be- normal waist height la i think, and since i bought it from kedai mamak, its plastic!”

Sarah: “Wehhhhh where can like that it cannot be placed in a handbag, you don’t have a handbag with you, is it in your hands in your pocket or where?”

Me: “But this is about my personality and I always carry a handbag. Dah la you generalise me now I cannot even keep my handbag???????”

Sarah: “Omg ok la ok la ok, so is your bag zipped or not?”

*I thought to myself wow this japanese cube test….does it really belong to the japanese or this Sarah bantai only she can alter alter questions all (Important to note Sarah is a medical school student so I gave her benefit of the doubt to assess me LOL)*

Me: “Its zipped, I don’t want to kena rompak (get mugged).”

Question Number 2: “Ok so now, there is also a ladder. What is the ladder made of? How high is the ladder, what does it look like and are you leaning towards the ladder or is the ladder leaning towards you?”

Answer Number 2: “First things first…why is there a ladder Sarah and how is it going to help Mr Cube and I?”

Sarah: “Weh…….. jawab je ah” (Just answer me pls)

*I think she is on her way to developing so much hate towards me HAHAHAHAHA*

Me: “Ok ok. The ladder is made of the normal ladder material la you buy from DIY Shops. Height also the normal height cause so high for what…what do I want to reach? The ladder is not leaning on me nor am I leaning on it. I just leave it there la on the ground also can.”

Sarah: “Omg…. fine…….so ladder is made of steel ok.”

Question Number 3: “Ok now the fun part! Theres a horse now. What colour is the horse? What type of horse is it?”

Answer Number 3: “WHY IS THERE A RANDOM HORSE PULAKKKK???? My horse is pink in colour and super fluffy. I don’t know my horse types.”

*Sarah thought this was funny, beats me really……*

Question Number 4: “Now, you can have flowers. How many flowers do you want in this scene?”

Answer Number 4: “Don’t want flower, lazy to water, later they will wilt and die.”

Question Number 5: “Theres a hurricane/thunderstorm. How far away is it from you and all your things?”

Answer Number 5: “The hurricane/thunderstorm is so far away, I cannot see, feel…it practically does not exist. I shall not be affected by a random hurricane! Jauh gila Sarah but if its meant to come closer, all I can say is: Come at me bro.”

These were my answers to Sarah’s Japanese Personality Test Questions. My answers must have annoyed her so much because she was gently massaging her temples after HAHAHAHAHAHA.

1: So apparently, the cube represents my EGO.

My ego is locked in at a decent level (waist level) and its made of plastic (wow can break so easily also…..hmmmm) The size of the cube is of a moderate normal size which means I am not a shy nor am I boldly confident. (????) AM I NOT SHY? BAHAHAHAHAHA. Is this why my friends always say I take reti malu??? (I have no shame)

2: The ladder represents my FRIENDS.

My friends are not dependent on me nor am I dependent on them. I apparently prefer independence (following if or not I’m leaning on the ladder or vice versa). My ladder is at a decent height which means I’m not one to keep a super long list of friends and prefer quality over quantity. The fact that my ladder is made of steel means my friends are very influential in my life LOL but doesnt that equate to dependence IDEK anymore. Sarah oh Sarah…..

3: The horse represents my IDEAL PARTNER (TOTALLY SHOT MYSELF IN THE FOOT)

I chose pink and fluffy so Sarah said my ideal partner is a metrosexual and…..ew hairy…… WTF HAHAHAHAHA. I stopped her before she could even continue and begged to differ.

“Sarah, I like my men like my Americano, strong and simple.”

“And black.” (Bodoh la Sarah ni ahhahahaha)

4: The flowers represent how many children you’d love to have.

I obviously chose no flowers so no children BAHAHAHAHAHA WHAT RUBBISH I LOVE KIDS OK…at least I think I do……..when I can AFFORD them.

5: The thunderstorm represents my fears.

I answered that the thunderstorm/hurricane is so far away from me it practically does not exist which means….I live with very little worry in life….

I then also continued but if its meant to be that the thunderstorm/hurricane pays a visit…”come at me bro..” which means I am more than ready to face any conflicts or my fears in life. I live a bulldozing life. WHICH I THINK IS QUITE ACCURATE. The first that is. LOL.

Sarah’s version rather differs from the one I googled and found online but its okay….I encourage creativity Ha Ha Ha.

But here is a link if you decide to try it out yourself or with your friends.

I am not one to buy these generic tests/horoscopes cause I believe we are each uniquely different and no test made by one person should lay us out + it might be a little misleading like hey look at where my pink fluffy horse took me LOL but if you’re up for a ton of fun… apparently someone Sarah knows answered black stallion HAHAHA!!, go for it!

Below is the link.

Japanese Personality Test

 

 

 

Let God path your way, he said.

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As i am writing this, i am also contemplating of deleting another draft I had saved earlier- one that makes me sound a lot more capable of being in conflicted emotions, but i’d rather not, just yet.

 

As i am writing this (part 2), i am also currently unable to put Paulo Coelho’s Adultery down. Contrary to the title, its not fifty shades of grey *married version* but more, much much more than that.

 

Bought this a couple of days ago in Curve and was just giving it a chance, Coelho is in fact one of my favourite writers but when Adultery was released..I just never gave it a second thought, unlike his other books (Witch of Portobello) is one of my favourite and holds one of my most fond memories in a little London Cafe somewhere near Holloway.

 

This whole thinking spree of mine started when I was engrossed in my book and a random stranger decided to join me. He must have thought what a lonely soul I was considering I was alone- is it not socially acceptable to be? I enjoy great company but I too enjoy some me time. Anyway, this random stranger turned out to be amazing company, worth throwing a receipt in my book to mark my last read page for.

 

We talked, for a while. He had amazing insights on many many important issues in the country but I’ll leave that to the depth of his published books. Man, it baffles me how intelligent people just decide to come up and speak to ME. Lol, me the one who loses her spectacles everyday and squints at the whiteboard in revision classes to manage one word, and give up.

 

He then asked me the million dollar string of questions.

 

“Are you married?”

 

“No, no I’m not.”

 

“Do you have a boyfriend?”

 

“I can’t seem to make anyone want to stay.”, and i giggled trying to mask the truth in that sentence.

He saw past that giggle.
“Did you have one?”, he continued.

 

“I did, I don’t anymore. We parted ways.”

 

*Thought to myself: its sad enough he saw me on my own thinking I needed company, pointed out I am not seeing anyone once, why am i now highlighting it on a pink billboard on Federal Highway..?*

 

He then went on to tell me a brief story of a love lost.

 

“I had a girlfriend when I was studying. I was smart, I didn’t think I was then but now, when I’m older and that intelligence is of almost no use, I remember how intelligent I actually was, I just doubted myself to no end.”

 

I nodded, acknowledging his story as he continued,

 

“I was from VI (Victoria Institution).”, he said, sounding a little disturbed that he is an alumni, sounding almost…if he had control of his past he would have chosen a different school.

 

“I believe in God, very much. A lot of things that as happened in my life, I leave it to God to show me the way.”

 

“Do you believe in God?”

 

“I do, very much.”

 

“Well, this girl I loved, still love to this very day saw the best in me when no one else did. Imagine, a boy like me and a tall, beautiful white girl. My mother believed in me. She believed in me. I wanted to bring her home, I wanted to be with her, but you see, she could only do so much here and I didn’t want great possibilities in her life to end just because, love.”

 

“So i left the states, leaving her behind knowing deep down, it was the right thing to do although I wish she was coming with me..”, he said as he looked down on his shoes and cleared his throat.

 

Man, am I glad I am open to random conversations with random people. Imagine what I would have missed out if I never exchanged smiles with him as he walked by the little Starbucks that led to all the restaurants down the road towards e-curve.

 

“What does the boy do now?”

 

“The boy? The one that left? Oh somewhere with the government, I think. He was previously attached to a fellowship initiative with the government.”

 

“And you? What do you do?”

 

“I am just trying to get enough sleep between my CLP classes.”, I joked.

 

“Do you still speak to the boy?”

 

“Oh no, barely ever. He has found someone else, and well, we move on.”

 

“Are you angry?”, he asked sounding extremely concerned. Like a father to a daughter. One, I barely had.

 

“Oh no, I just don’t find the reason to speak to him anymore but things happen, usually for the reasons we’ll eventually find out and I’m okay with that, now I am. Some things are meant to be, while some, are meant to be forgotten.”, I answered as I finished it off with a little laugh.

 

“This girl I told you about, remember? She was my gift from God. A gift that was only meant to be mine momentarily, not forever. She showed me who I can become if only I took a second to breathe and appreciate myself. She believed in me so much that I started believing in myself. It is for her faith in me, it is for God’s faith in me to be able to take care of her for that short time, that I am who I am, where I am today.”

 

He smiled, looking almost relieved to be able to tell his story to someone who might be able to put the wisdom to good use. As i said, like a father to a daughter.

 

“This boy, you were his gift from God as he was probably was yours, but I believe God gives only the good for his people, so maybe he wasn’t your gift.”, he joked.

 

“Sometimes”, he said. “People don’t appreciate gifts as they should. Even if the gifts came from the higher power. All we can do is know that we have given our best and the rest of our path, let God walk us through it.”

 

He then went on to give me advice on universities I should do my masters in as he was a lecturer himself.

 

“Aim high, higher than high, aim the highest you can. When they told me to aim for Harvard, I laughed but I telling you now because nowhere a good heart and a good head can’t take you. Aim high and wherever you choose to go, whatever you choose to do, I’ll pray for you. I’ll always pray for you.”

 

A few minutes later, his wife walked by finished with her shopping and they went on to enjoy the rest of their night while I reopened my book and continued where I left off, pretending like the conversation I just had did not shake my soul. (ceeeeh)

 

We kept in touch and have exchanged a few emails. He is now looking to meet up so he can give me the books he has read over the many many many years, and I am thrilled he has chosen me to share his wisdom with.

Who’s in who’s out? 

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Does it freak you out when something so normal… so routine to you just…doesn’t exist anymore? 

Something as simple as someone you’d talk to on a daily basis to probably number 2 on the complex scale, graduating university and jumping into the workforce. 

Cause it definitely does freak me out, although I’ve been told it’s common, your friend today might not be your friend in a week, you’d stop talking just because, you’d move cities… and ya la a ton of other things, pfft. Unfamiliarity is so weird – probably contradicting my earlier writes about embracing uncertainty hahahahahha.

It’s common especially at this age (early 20’s) as you’ll be moving places, doing things and meeting a ton of people along the way. But I mean this only applies to the everyday people you surround yourself with.. right? And not like your close ones that you crap all day on your what’s app groups with talking about everything and sometimes shamefully nothing… but just throwing alphabets forming words and subsequently forming sentences that means nothing….? 😂

People come and go, PEOPLE, general sense. It doesn’t apply to THE PEEPS.. NOPE. So I’m safe and the rest of you I throw sentences that don’t mean anything to, you’re stuck bahahahahah. 😉😉😉

But, 

If the ones I hold close to my heart were to drift away, remember that the odds are at some point you were important… maybe one of the most important, in a nutshell, you were significant. 

But, again, 

I will over the next few years not remember you as much as I’d hope. You’ll be fragments. I’d come across little things and be briefly reminded of you but we all… move on. 

But, again x2, 

I’ll always have your back, even when I get super touchy that we had to drift away. 

I’ll always want the best for you even if i catch myself wishing I was able to witness your journey in achieving  your greatest desires in life. 

*wipes tears* 😔

#justbeenratherhormonalrecently 🙁

  
Here is a guy with a batman shaped moustache. 😘 

Dumpling’s first week at work #2 

Had a little time in my hands today so I made my way to Naj & Belle in SS15 Courtyard, Subang Jaya to kepoh for dumpling’s first week (second day) at work. 

I guess she really couldn’t let being a barista go even after full-time employment LOL. 

 
So if any of you fancy being served by a leng lui named dumpling, please make your way to Naj & Belle SS15 Courtyard. 

What to order? I wouldn’t know. I had a long black cause konon on a strict diet but from dumpling’s explanation of how the pavlova melts in your mouth like cotton candy but with more texture, I would recommend it cause trust… 😂     #disclaimliabilityifnotascottoncandyish 

Bits and pieces of dumpling’s new part time work place. 

                            #illovemyfriends 

                            #imsosupportive 

   
    
       
 

Young blood 

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Today, while driving I was all woozy and feeling pretty meh so I thought nothing like my usual coffee fix to get me going so I made a turn and head towards my favourite Starbucks, the one is ss15- it is after all where I grew the most as a person. 

As I was taking a breather from the daily responsibilities in life (woah) and just people watching I saw a couple arguing in the middle of the road LOL and was also condincidentally leaning on my car. Both of them. I wasn’t very concerned that they were leaning on my car but more towards the fact that I have not sent it for washing for about a month 😂😂. 

#disclaimdirtywhitetshirtliability 

#youchoosetolean 

#onewashtenringgitexpensiveok 😅

It hit me right in my face then, how exhausting it was to argue with your SO. I’ve got no current experience but I do remember the days when I had a boyfriend and arguing was one of the itinerary of our day. (I am exaggerating but we did argue a ton, young blood they say, can’t seem to agree on anything and even if we did, we chose not to cause ego la hallllooooo) 🙄 

The leaning on my car couple was also… maybe 19/20 y/o max and they were a joy to see reminding me of my days as 19 year old with a long term boyfriend. I would say I’m sorry they were not in good terms but… you’ve got to see through this phase before moving on to another and for that I think it was okay to leverage on their what seemed to be a very very unnecessary argument. There was also a lot of Hindustan la chasing one another back and forth LOL. The downside of this whole thing was that they were also quite rude to each other although I choose to believe they are in love which brings me to… 

Why do we accommodate those who are rude to us? Subtly or bluntly, being rude is being rude. We may be head over heels in love with someone but it doesn’t make it okay for us to be rude to them or vice versa. Aside all the bonds we have with each other, we are still individuals that deserves respect. 
Maybe that’s why we should wait before jumping into relationships, especially if we’re young. Young blood- makes you say a ton of things you don’t mean, do a ton of things you don’t actually want to do just to prove a point. 
With age comes wisdom- so I choose to believe la hahahahahha. 

22 and bullied

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I’m 22 and still get bullied god damn.

So about three days ago I was bullied, road bullied by a short indian man who was driving a Honda Stream that did not even belong to him (as I subsequently discovered after making a police report)

I was driving on the Elite Highway en route KLIA, dropping a friend off at the KLIA. Halfway through this Honda Stream (plate shall not be stated) was just being an absolute arsehole on the right lane which is obviously the fast lane and I was in a rush to make it in time for the flight (classic). So I got annoyed and maintained my right signal for a bit but he refused to move so i flashed him a couple of times although I am well aware thats not what the beam lights are for BUT IN MY DEFENSE HE SHOULD HAVE MOVED.

So he made way and I went through but I’m assuming he then got really angry and started dangerously tailgating me and kept his high beam on which was bad news for myself because I have crazy astigmatism and brights lights impairs my eyesight.

BRIGHT LIGHT IMPAIRS MY EYESIGHT BUT THIS FKING BEAM JUST MADE ME BLIND AND I COULD BARELY DRIVE ANYMORE.

This entire fiasco went on all the way till I parked by the international drop off at KLIA and went to the police officers with details of the driver (plate, colour etc) and told them what he had done. Police officers searched for his car around the KLIA vicinity but was unable to locate him which made me scared shitless cause…. WHAT IF IT HAPPENS AGAIN.

The officers had this weird otter box looking device that has the information of all registered drivers and vehicle owners in the country so we searched the plate and realised it belonged to an Indian lady from Negeri Sembilan or Seremban..? Meh, insignificant. Anyway, dropped my friend off and decided to go home and risk it.

Officers told me to speed as fast as I can and I asked them “Wah what if I get summons..expensive la.”

“Is your life worth the summons?”

“Worth more than that la but still expensive..”

LOL CAUSE I MEAN COME ON DELIBERATELY CALLING SUMMONS UPON MYSELF…

Then they told me to keep their identity number of some sort and speed anyway, in the event that I think I might have been caught by speed traps, I can just go up to a station and clear it out under a few conditions. They were worried my car was gonna get smashed or something.. and it was 8pm and the Elite Highway is somewhat ample at that hour and anything can happen.

So i went on WAH OKAY CAN SPEED FREELY WOO WOO WOO

AND WOPEDIFKINGDOOOOOOOOO, even the sun sets in paradise. My biggest nightmare came out of absolutely nowhere and was still angry WTF.

Please don’t read me wrong, I was pretty shaken already and…crying even when I was on the way to the airport because…we could have crashed big time and crashing at 130km/h is not a pretty sight.. sigh.

Right so, yeah. There he was right behind me again this time only a lot more aggressive and he was keeping his high beam, tailgating and squaring me in… By this time I was crying buckets already and quite sure I’ll be crashing into a divider any time.

But my parents were calling and my best friend left a message so I kept cool and acted a-okay like the drive home was a breeze and i had Arctic Monkeys playing from my Spotify.

Called the police while I was speeding towards my death being squared in, tailgated, and blinded by this Honda Stream.

I don’t have words to explain the next twenty to thirty minutes of the drive as I was busy peeing in my pants (i was genuinely afraid and shaking) but the police (two cars) then arrived the only way they could arrive while two people are speeding on the road (they were speeding big time too) and demanded the guy to stop. God knows what happened to him then but I made a police report after and I’m still disgustingly afraid on highways till this very second.

Wonder how much he spent on his petrol just to freak me out on that night.. cause my tank dried up man. What a way to take Sepang into real life.